This is Why You Fail in the Gym, Part 5 (Final)

11 Oct

Yep.  This is the final part in this 5 part series.

Don’t cry guys.

No, please don’t, cause if you cry, I’ll cry.

Oh no, wait, that only works with me and vomit…

Anyway, yes, this is the last part of the series but the blog will live on of course!  And this final piece of the puzzle is to me the MOST important piece.  If you do not have this, you have nothing.  You will 100% fail if you do not have this.  Trust me.

Motivation.  It’s all about DESIRE.  How badly you want something.  What lengths you will go to to get it.  How hard you will push yourself and what sacrifices you will make.

I was having a chat to a work friend the other day who has, over the past year, lost a whopping 5okg.  That is no easy feat!   She was saying how her friends keep asking her what her “secret” was.   And she said to me that there is no “secret”, it’s just a sudden realisation that this is more important to you than anything.  We agreed that it’s something within you that if other people don’t have it then it’s hard to explain to explain to them how to get it.

But I’m going to attempt to do just that.  Let’s go on a journey of self-discovery…

Look, you can set goals until the cows come home but if you do not have the motivation to make those goals reality they are nothing but words.  They have no importance to you because there is no consequence if you don’t achieve them – you simply just don’t meet your goal.  The end.  Let’s have another piece of cake.

So, how do we get the motivation to achieve the goal?  How do we make it a priority above all else?  How do we KEEP motivation from slipping when our goals could take weeks, months, or years to achieve?

For me, it was easy.  Lose weight or get diabetes.  Simple.   However, before I knew that I was close to having diabetes I had always wanted to lose weight.  I felt such self-loathing towards myself which I projected outwards onto others.  I was miserable in my own skin (not to mention just a plain old misery to be around) and I couldn’t believe I had let myself get that way.   I did what most people do though, I let life get in the way and never made my goal important enough to take action towards achieving it.

So, why do YOU want to lose weight?  That’s the first and foremost question you need to ask yourself.  WHY.  It might be because you feel uncomfortable and depressed at your current size, it might be because you’re not fit enough to keep up with the kids or maybe it’s because you feel lethargic and tired all the time and want that zest for life back.  Whatever the reason is you need to own up to it.  You need to recognise it and understand it.  Do not brush it off as a passing thought – it is reality and you need to face it.

After you have had a think about “why” then you need to have a think about what is the consequence if you don’t reach your goal?  Again, my consequence was that I would wind up having diabetes but even if that wasn’t the case the consequences were pretty dire.  If I continued on my pattern of self-loathing and body hate I was going to end up alienating myself from friends and family and  living a life of “make-believe”, where I acted like I was happy but I was really far from it.  I would have just existed in this world rather than lived life to it’s fullest because I didn’t think that I was worthy of happiness.  Yeah.  Deep right?  If you look within yourself and starting asking yourself these things you will go deep too.  And it’s hard.  It’s REALLY hard to face up to these feelings, but well worth it.  Because you will start to recognise the motivation within you to do something about it.  Write down your reasons and consequences and keep them somewhere close.

Right, so now that we’ve all had a look into our souls and hopefully had that “lightbulb” moment we can start to spur ourselves into action.

The first few weeks are the hardest and it is when you are most likely to make a few slip ups or even just dump the plan all together.  If you feel like that is about to happen, go back and read your reasons and consequences.  You’re making a promise to yourself here to build a better and healthier life.  Why would you want to let yourself down like that?  It’s so exhausting trying and failing and trying and failing over and over again.  It’s time to just do it and get it over and done with!  Once and for all!

The most important things to keep you on track are planning and organisation.  If I didn’t do these things I would be a complete failure.  Every week I enter into my diary what exercise I am going to do and what time I am going to do it.  I schedule it in and I make no excuses.  I get it done because it is my priority.  I am too important to myself to let myself down. I know that if I don’t do my planned exercise it will just mean my goal is further away from me achieving it.   Nuh uh.  Not happening.

I also  plan all my meals and snacks and have everything on hand, ready to go.  This means I have no excuses to eat something that is not on the plan.

In the beginning I of course made this blog to keep me accountable and I recall some of my earlier posts were about what I was eating that day or what exercise I was doing.  This helped IMMENSELY.  Even if you just create a private blog or keep a diary, it will help keep you accountable.

For me, once I had done the soul-searching and organised and put some structure into my life, it provided me with the motivation to continue, day in and day out, to make myself a better, healthier, happier version of me that I could ever dream possible.

And once you start getting results, oooooo weeee, now THAT’S motivation.  You won’t want to stop because you can feel and see the changes that are taking place in your body week after week.  That spurs you on like nothing else.  Plus, you get fitter, less tired and exercise becomes easier.  You get used to your new healthy way of eating and all of a sudden it all falls into place and it just becomes life, second-nature to you.

There you have it – that’s my take on motivation and what it takes to keep going.  Now do you dare share your reasons and consequences in the comments below?  I think you should!  Go on… do it!  🙂


13 Responses to “This is Why You Fail in the Gym, Part 5 (Final)”

  1. Angela. October 11, 2011 at 8:07 pm #

    This is so true. I’ve lost 16kg so far this year and everyone keeps on asking what my secret was, all I did was eat healthy and work out. My motivation was the same as yours, not getting Diabetes. I planned my meals, planned my work outs and kept going. I set myself small goals and each time I reached my goals I would get a small rewards, like a manicure, hair cut etc. I have 7kgs left to go but I’m happy, healthy and motivated.

    • Amanda October 11, 2011 at 8:28 pm #

      That’s great Angela! I love this! 😀

  2. Catie October 11, 2011 at 9:52 pm #

    Fantastic post Amanda. I get the feeling you were really writing from the heart – no bull. For me, the ultimate motivation is the desire to feel good, happy. I know exercise and healthy eating makes me feel great. It may not always be the easiest route, and getting up at 6am to train can be a pain in the glut, but knowing how i’ll feel at the end of a training session kicks me into gear. Nothing beats it! It’s empowering. The habits you slowly develop make it easier to sustain, and eventually you can’t imagine living any other way! People like you go a long way in inspiring others, so proud & in awe of your efforts 🙂

    • Amanda October 12, 2011 at 9:17 am #

      Thanks Catie for your sweet words! That one was all heart, it was. 😉 And I love those reasons! I feel the same. 🙂

  3. Ali @ October 12, 2011 at 12:57 pm #

    i wrote a similar post (although not as good as yours) on motivation the other day! right now i’m motivated by a trip to vietnam in december and want to have the best bikini body ive ever had! i’ve set myself a number of goals and right now am motivated to look my best by december!

    • Amanda October 18, 2011 at 1:59 pm #

      Awesome! You can do it!!!

  4. Cathy Choi October 12, 2011 at 3:52 pm #

    Very well said Miss Mandy!!

    • Amanda October 18, 2011 at 2:00 pm #

      Thanks Cathy! 🙂

  5. fmlquixote October 12, 2011 at 9:16 pm #

    Thanks for your lovely blog. I turn 40 this year and my motivation is primarily wanting to feel comfortable in my own skin as well as combating emerging health issues; cholesterol, PCOS and an under active thyroid, at times it feels overwhelming. Your Blog has re inspired me to commit to my own journey, thank you. Bec

    • Amanda October 18, 2011 at 2:00 pm #

      Oh you are most welcome! Good luck on your journey! 🙂

  6. Andie Hilliar (@andiehilliar) October 24, 2011 at 7:36 pm #

    Hi Amanda, re-read this post because I needed some motivation and it really hit home. Two years ago I lost 15kg through the Weight Watchers program, and I am STILL trying to lose the last few kilos, get to where I am fully and completely happy with my body.

    SO – want to feel confident and proud of my body – I want to be the best that I can be because right now, at this age and time in my life, is the time that I have the opportunity to set the foundations for a healthier life. I want to be the best version of myself.

    If I just stuck to my guns two years ago and kept going, I would be there now – I don’t want to fail again or have to ‘start over’ another time. THIS IS IT. 🙂

  7. David December 23, 2011 at 1:30 pm #

    HI Amanda,

    Apart from good exercise and diet, I think that motivation is one of the most important factors when it comes to exercise and weight loss.

    I see it a bit like quitting smoking ( not a healthy comparison, but it is the best one I have). It takes for a mental switch to go on in someones head before they can really quit ( they have to REALLY want to do it), and the same thing applies with exercise and weight loss.

    I have tried to convince a friend of mine who is quite obese to do exercise with me, but she always finds a reason not to do it. Something always comes up. Until she got to a point where something inside of her clicked, and she really wanted to start exercising with me. In the end she came to me! Since then she has lost over 25 kgs and now there is no stopping her!

    • Amanda December 28, 2011 at 12:30 pm #

      I totally agree. 🙂 And well done to your friend! That is fantastic! 😀

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